Blessings in Disguise

I just finished reading my Bible.  I’ve been a little lax lately in my personal Bible study.  And, God just whacked me over the head.  It’s amazing.

I opened my Bible to my new favorite Psalm—119.  I’ve been reading and praying through it, all though, I can’t really use the word “lately.”  It amazes me how positive this Psalm is even though it is obvious the writer is suffering.  One of the verses I just read is a prime example.  “It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees.

And I realized how true this verse is to my life.  You see, before I was wallowing in the pits of postpartum depression, I was in the same place I am now.  I read the Bible with my husband at night before bed.  I read Bible stories with my kids.  I went to Bible study.  But I didn’t really have a personal connection with God through his word.

Then, at Christmas, my Mom gave me a book.  I really wasn’t looking for something more to do—I felt burdened under the weight of being a mom to three kids and a wife and a homemaker and a piano teacher and ….the list kept going.  I really just wanted to stay at my parents’ house and let them run my life for me again.  Instead, I read the book and was encouraged to start reading my Bible, praying through the Psalms.

At first, I felt strange, writing prayers based on the Psalms.  I couldn’t always make the writers’ feelings meld with mine.  But, the more I read, the easier it got.  And then, I embarked on a many-month journey.  It really shouldn’t have been, but I started reading Psalm 119 in March.  And I still haven’t made it all the way through.

And here’s why, I think.  I was diagnosed with postpartum depression, started taking medication, and it started working.  I’m feeling more and more like my old self every day.  This is really unfortunate because now I feel as though I don’t need to read the Bible as faithfully.  I’m not clinging to God’s promises in utter desperation, trying to survive the storms of life.  I’ve felt pretty good about how my life is going, and I haven’t kept up the good connection I need to God’s word.

But God threw another stumbling block my way.  And tonight I was led back to my Bible, back to my favorite Psalm.  And God reminded me why I need to be whacked over the head time and time again.  These afflictions keep me tied to Him, my Salvation.

Tonight my prayer is this: Father, forgive me.  Thank you for afflicting me.  Keep me true and close to you.  Amen.

Shock and Awe

Oldest vacuuming last week.

A few weeks ago, we were getting our house ready for company.  As I was sweeping the kitchen floor, I heard the closet door open.  I turned and watched in awe as my oldest son, without prompting, got out the vacuum, plugged it in, and started vacuuming the steps.  I obviously haven’t been expecting enough of him.

I probably shouldn’t have been that surprised, though.  My husband and I really feel that doing chores and helping out is just part of being a family.  We start almost as soon as they can walk—the kids help us pick up their toys.  We let them help us wash dishes, set the table, vacuum, sweep and wash the floor.  I figure, get them in the habit of helping while they’re actually excited to help.

But, there’s an even more important part of giving kids responsibility: it helps them feel important.  They know they are a contributing part of the family.

Middle helping out a few years ago.

Of course, as a mom, it requires some patience.  I have to let them learn to do the tasks on their own.  I can almost always do the job much faster, and in a better order, than they can.  But, if I let them work on a chore on their own, they take ownership and pride in their work.  And, they learn they can do something on their own.  (And, of course, eventually, I won’t even have to follow behind them, right?)

My challenge now is to find the tasks they are good at and give them over to each child.  My daughter seems to enjoy cooking with me and cleaning up the kitchen.  My oldest son loves to help his dad collect the trash and take it out to the street.  My baby is just learning what goes in each cabinet (by taking everything out of the cabinets, of course!).

I pray that I have the patience to continue to encourage my kids to learn to be independent, helpful members of our family.  One day, they can teach their kids, too.  (Thanks, Dad and Mom!!!)

Happy Mothers’ Day

My husband walked into our room last night and said, “We don’t deserve this.”  He had just checked on our children and was commenting on how blessed he felt to be their Dad.  I wasn’t feeling that exact sentiment at that point in time.  I was exhausted from chasing three kiddos around all day and was feeling a little sorry for myself for having to put up with their naughty behavior.

But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that my attitude should be much more like my husband’s.  I’ve shared with you many of the lessons I’ve learned from being a mother.  I’ve experienced so much joy at watching them grow.  And it’s a blessing to be able to share Jesus’ love with them every day.  In years past, I’ve felt somewhat neglected on Mothers’ Day.  I’ve allowed myself to wallow in a pool of self-pity because my husband has been busy with his job.  I’ve felt as though I deserve to be served and fawned over.  But in reality it’s a blessing just to get to be a Mom.

And God lets me continue to try to be a better Mom.  Not only that, he’s allowed me to have a wonderful day with my family.  I’ve been showered with hugs, kisses, I love you’s, gifts and beautiful weather.  My husband washed, dried and folded all five loads of laundry that needed to be done this weekend.  My big kids played with each other happily all afternoon.  And, yes, we had to confront and deal with sinful behavior, but that wasn’t the focus of the day.  Today I focused on all the blessings I am afforded just by being a Mom.

To all the many Moms in my life, a very happy Mothers’ Day.  May you continue to blessed in your walk.