Idle Hands

I have a friend who always starts his New Years’ resolution on the first Sunday of Advent.  (It’s the start of the new church year.)  While this may seem a little odd at first, I’ve come to realize he’s really doing himself a favor.  Since it takes three weeks for a habit to become routine, he’s already gotten his New Year’s resolution under the belt just when the rest of us are starting.  And, since everyone is talking about New Year’s resolutions around that time of year, he has reminder to keep going once the habit is formed.

Lately I’ve noticed that, when I’m not exhausted from chasing kiddos, during nap time I tend to spend a lot of time on the computer.  And usually I’m on Facebook.  It’s amazing (read the sarcasm here) how much time I can waste just catching up on people’s lives and playing a few games.  And then I wonder where my afternoon went and why supper isn’t ready on time.

Today God whacked me over the head yet again.  I realized how many of my friends could use a prayer.  (I’m sure all of you could!)  And so, my New Year’s resolution, which I’m starting today, is to pray first.  Once the kids are all napping, I’m going to spend a few minutes (or a lot of minutes) praying.  My house is quiet and, even if I’m going to join the nappers in dream land, prayers is a fantastic way to get myself ready for the next task.

As all good resolutions go, though, I’m going to need some help.  First, if you wouldn’t mind, send me a message to let me know you’d like me to pray for you.  You don’t have to tell me why; God always knows what you need.  Second, I’m going to need some reminders.  Maybe you wouldn’t mind asking me how my resolution is going.  Or maybe you have a good idea for a self-reminder that I can put somewhere in my house.

God doesn’t always give us concrete answers to our prayers, but I know that he wants to hear us and promises to listen.  So, keep your eyes open for God’s answer to your prayers.

Blessings!

A Good Reminder

My husband and I have had conversations with several parents in the past few weeks about their children’s behaviors.  The children range in age from toddlers to adults.  And yet, all of the conversations have been focused on how to get children to behave in the appropriate way.

I’m always surprised when people ask how I get my children to behave.  After all I spend much of my day reminding them not to poke each other in the eye; asking them to pick up their toys and clothes; putting someone on the step for hitting someone else; and the list goes on and on.  How should I know how to get kids to behave?

Then, when a woman at Target asked me how I kept my oldest two from running away from me while shopping (they were walking alongside the cart), I really had to stop and think.  I’ve never really had a problem with someone running off while shopping (although, I can see that this might be a problem VERY soon with number three!).  How do I get my children to behave?

The answer came to me as we loaded up in the van.  My daughter began singing and asked us all to join her.  We were singing various Bible songs—“Jesus Loves Me,” “Jesus Loves the Little Children,” “The B-I-B-L-E” and so on.

It really isn’t me (or my husband) who gets the children to behave.  (And to be truthful, they really aren’t my children.)  It’s the Holy Spirit working inside of His children, helping them to show love to one another, to share their faith, to listen and obey.

So what’s my role, then, as their Mama?  Can I just sit back and let them go, now that they’ve been baptized?  Wouldn’t that be nice?

Hopefully you already understand my role.  My role is to continue to remind them, again and again, what God-pleasing behavior is.  It’s to use the tools God has given me: His word, earthly discipline and LOVE.

My two oldest are starting to understand the ways of the world.  This evening, my daughter said to me, “Mama, you are being mean!”  My oldest son chimed in, “Don’t you love her, mama?”  I explained to both of them that sometimes it takes something that seems mean to show love.  I love my kids so much that I need to use discipline to correct the behavior so that it doesn’t continue and eventually lead to something much worse.

I’ve commented to more than a few mothers that I’m glad my kids behave when they are with other people, but that I wish they would occasionally behave so well for me.  As the woman in Target pointed out, I wasn’t really paying attention very well.  I sometimes become so focused on the difficult task of training up my children that I miss seeing them put their training into practice.  I pray God helps me see the wonders He is working everyday.

The Fourth Commandment

We’ve been working with our kids on showing respect.   Especially since our oldest has started school, we seem to have more “No”s being said in our house.  My husband and I have repeatedly reminded our children of the Fourth Commandment in which God tells us to honor our parents and others in authority.

It’s a hard job for all of us, isn’t it?  I remember my first real fight with my dad.  It happened just before I left for college.  I signed up for a credit card over the phone.  Back then, we didn’t have to worry as much about identity theft.  I thought it was a good idea for emergencies.  My dad was upset that I hadn’t consulted him.  And, since I felt like and adult, I yelled at him.  I still regret how angry I was with my dad.  Fortunately, my parents had instilled in me a responsibility with money and I didn’t get into trouble with my credit card in college.

Even though I don’t think I’ve had a hard time honoring and respecting my parents lately (let me know if I’m wrong, Mom and Dad), I still struggle with the Fourth Commandment.  God tells us to honor those in authority.  It’s that simple.

Do I honor the authority when I speed, even just to keep up with traffic?  Do I honor authority when I complain about the taxes I have to pay?  What kind of an example do I set for my children?

Where I live I have seen many people struggling to honor authority this past month.  People are frustrated with the Government, with our President and with our elected leaders.  As citizens of a democracy we have the right to be frustrated and to voice our frustration.  But I have heard and read people’s frustration growing into disrespect.  They are not honoring the people God has put over us as our leaders by their words and actions.

As a citizen, I am equally frustrated by the choices made by the government officials.  But that does not give me the license to call those people names or to belittle them.

So what should I do?

First and foremost, I can pray.  And I have been.  I pray regularly for our government, for our President and for the people we have elected to make decisions for us.  And I thank God for the blessing I have to live in a democratic society.  Secondly, as I voice my opinion and my concern for the government, I can use respectful language.  And, finally, I can educate myself and be prepared to vote in a way that shows my concern for the government.

I ask you, my fellow Americans, to remember the Fourth Commandment as you live your lives as citizens of this nation.

My Children, the Squirrels

Today I vacuumed out our van.  It took me almost an hour…and it’s just a minivan.  Part of the reason (actually, most of the reason) it took that long is because my children had squirreled away books, left over snacks, socks and shoes in the back seat.  It’s as though they wanted to be prepared for spending the rest of the fall in the van.  The most amazing part to me is that I vacuumed up more than 15 walnut/acorn/tree nuts.  I’m pretty sure that there is another one hiding away somewhere, too.

Of course, I am somewhat like my children.  I like to be prepared.  I keep extra socks and shoes for my two oldest in the van in case they decide to leave the house without footwear (which has happened more than once).  I also have diapers and wipes stored away, lest we accidentally forget to stock the diaper bag/backpack.

Speaking of our diaper bag, you should see what I’ve put in there!  Diapers, wipes, extra outfits for four children, books, toys, extra snacks, pens and pencils.  And then there’s my stuff.  Since I have to tote a backpack, I’ve decided to stop carrying a purse.  So, all the things that once resided in my purse also are crammed into the backpack.

While it is good to be prepared, I had a revelation as I was vacuuming.  In Bible class on Sunday, one of our friends reminded us that we should be squirrelling away more than just things.  He encouraged us to keep Bible passages at our fingertips.  Or, more specifically, at the tip of our memories.  And, just knowing a verse, without the reference, wasn’t enough for him.  He pointed out that we need to be able to open our Bibles and show those references to the people we come in contact with.

And so, for the first time in much, much too long, I’ve set about doing just that: squirrelling away treasures from the Bible.  I don’t have the fancy smart phone app that our friend suggested using (mostly because I don’t have a smart phone).  But, I do have a Bible and time to repeat a verse again and again.  So here it is:  Psalm 50:15—Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you and you will honor me.

I hope you have some time to start doing some squirrelling of your own.  Maybe you can cheat (like I did) and learn your kids’ memory passages with them.  Or, maybe you have a part of the Bible you want to know better.  But, there’s nothing better than to have God’s word hidden away in your heart and memory.

Welcome!

Today I toted three kids to the doctor, and the appointment wasn’t actually for any of them.  It was for me.  I was following up with my “family” doctor about my post-partum depression.  I use the word “family” haltingly, though, and here’s why.

As we were not taken back to the room where we would be seeing the doctor until half an hour after our scheduled appointment time, the two little boys (my one-year-old and the 6 month-old I baby sit) were getting quite restless.  I held the youngest as I pushed the double stroller with my daughter and son into the room.  The nurse was polite and asked if I needed help and smiled at the kids as she ran through the reasons I was there.  I mentioned the follow-up and that I am currently pregnant again.  She smiled and went to get the doctor.

As the doctor walked in, she just looked at me holding a baby, singing to all three, and shook her head in surprise and disbelief.  “Didn’t we talk about birth control?” she asked.  “You have two in diapers.”

I pointed out that only one of mine is currently in diapers, that I’ve always had two in diapers when a new baby comes around, and that my two oldest children will be in school full time next year.  But, she interrupted me.

“What are you and your husband going to do?  Four is enough.  Surgery for him or you?”

I assured her that we would talk about it, too shocked at the chastising I was receiving to offer any other protests.

Welcome to the world, my new little one.

See, today, many people look on family as a burden, not a blessing.  They assume that parents would much rather selfishly spend their money on toys to make their lives happier instead of providing for future generations.  They look at parents with pity instead of encouraging them to do their best to raise loving children.

But, my new little one, you don’t need to worry.  It’s not that your dad and I love you so much already, that we’ll do the best we can to take care of you, that we’ll raise you to be a loving and loved child.  Those are true.  But, my baby, even more wonderful is that you have a heavenly Father who is looking after you at all times.  He is the one who decided the time was right to bring you into our family (even if your dad and I were VERY surprised).  He is the one who holds you in His hand constantly, keeping you safe.  And He is the one who wants you to be a part of His heavenly kingdom one day.

To give my doctor the benefit of the doubt, perhaps she was just looking out for my mental health.  I wish she had taken the time, though, to ask about the joy I have in caring for my family and the privilege of caring for another mommy’s precious little boy.  I wish she had inquired as to the welfare of my children.  I wish, at the very least, she had offered me congratulations.

Tonight, I’ll include her in my prayers.  I pray that God gives her the opportunity to see the blessing that family can be.  I pray that she recognize it as a gift from Him.  I pray that she learn to know Jesus as her Savior.

I’ll pray for you, too, Baby.  I pray that God blesses you your whole life with a love for him that will show itself in many ways.  And, I pray that God blesses you with a family of your own one day to love and care for, just as he has given me the blessing of a wonderful and very full family.